3 Days Left!

Only 3 days until our new little addition will make his or her grand entrance! It's actually less than three days! Monday morning at 9:30am, we will know if this little bundle of joy that has been growing in may enormous belly is a boy or a girl! I cannot wait to find out! There is nothing in this world I want more than to have healthy children. I don't care if this baby is a boy, a girl, blond hair, black hair, bald, a screamer, or easy... I just pray that he or she is healthy. This little one, along with Katelyn, have so much love in their life already, I know that whatever the case may be, her or she, will be incredible, and will be loved unconditionally.

It's amazing how life lessons occur. In my short (almost) 25 years of life, I've been dealt a lot of hands. From as early as I can remember I've had to make important decisions, decisions that no child, much less person, should ever have to make. Through these life lessons and experiences I have grown and matured and learned to take care of myself and my loved ones. I don't understand the things that happen to us, to our family, and especially to our children, but I do know that through these experiences, even the horrible ones, we learn about ourselves, and we learn how to take care of the ones we love. As a big sister, I've helped my sisters grow and mature and hope that I have an effect on their life's path. As a mother, I can only hope that I not let my children down, or myself for that matter. I have greater hopes and expectations than I had for myself, but I know that no matter what, my children will live wonderful lives. I am very thankful for my life as it is. I wouldn't change my children or my husband, or the relationships we have for anything in the world. I am very grateful to be a mother. It is the most amazing thing in the world. I never thought that I could love someone as much as I love Katelyn, and the new baby. I never thought that I could have the strength to fight for my childs life. It is the most difficult think a person can do, but now, I believe that any person can do it. The strength that we, as parents, draw from our children is indescribable. When you hear or see people supporting their children as they fight to live, and fight to live a long life, it is almost unbarable to watch, even as an outsider. I was that outsider at one point, and I never thought I could be that fighter, watching, hoping, and praying that my child live. It's amazing what life can throw at you. One day I have a healthy, beautiful 15 month old daughter who loves the park, loves the pool, wants to eat grapes every second of the day, and is hilarious; I have an amazing husband whom I love more and more every day; and I am blessed to be carrying another incredible life inside of me. Then, out of nowhere, life throws a horrible curve ball, and although I still have my amazing husband, and a blessing inside of me, I also have fear and confusion about my ever incredible daughter. When we found out that Katelyn had Leukemia, and that her leukemia was incredibly rare and difficult to treat (if at all treatable), it was the worst thing I could have ever heard. No person should have that fear for their child. She deserves nothing but the best, nothing but the finest things in life. To have cancer? To possibly lose her young life? These things don't make sence. Those things shouldn't happen to children. I've watched my baby fight for her life, and do it unknowingly. The strength and energy that Katelyn has had these last 19 weeks is awe inspiring. It's unreal. If ever I have the courage and strength that my 20 month old daughter has displayed in her short life, I will forever be indebted to her; as she is my inspiration. What strength I have posessed through these last 5 months, I also owe to her. Without her smile and incredible personality, I would have broken. I can't believe that I have been able to do this. I don't know how I've done it. I know that Katelyn's strength has driven Todd and I through this. I know that without God, an without His love and the strength He gives to us through Him, we wouln't be able to do this. Without the prayers, love, and support of our family and friends, we wouldn't have been able to get through this. Although I will never understand the many lessons life has thrown my way, I am grateful to be here, I am grateful for the things that I've learned, and for the strength that I've drawn from those difficult times. Mostly, I am grateful for my family.

With only 1 more round of chemotherapy left, I pray that this be it. I pray that Katelyn stay strong and healthy, and that she be forever free of cancer. I will pray everyday that God keep His healing touch on my baby, and that through Him she stay healthy and live a long, happy, healthy life.